Play & Writing
I have always loved words.
Even as a little boy at school they held a fascination for me.
Over the years my principal way of expressing this has been in creating song lyrics.
With my well-thumbed rhyming dictionary and my battered Thesaurus at hand I have spent thousands of hours trying to perfect the rhymes, rhythms and cadences which make up a good lyric.
However, every now and then a shard of inspiration stabs into my head and I am compelled to write some prose, a poem or even a play. I want to share a couple of them now.
The first is a play called ‘Trickster’s Last Throw’
I wrote it based on some myths of the Winnebago First Nation people who live in what is now Wisconsin.
When I first encountered these wonderful tales I laughed out loud so much that they asked me to leave the Museum of Mankind.
I performed it with my actor/friend Robert East at The Young Vic Studio in London. It was directed by another actor/buddy David Henry. I played Trickster.
A Poem
BILLY-BACK-TO-FRONT
© Tim Thomas 2021
(Duration 5 minutes)
I’ll tell you a story about a strange young man,
His tale has no beginning, no-one knows how it began.
His name was Billy-Back-To-Front, he was the wrong way round,
His feet were where his head should be, his chin was near the ground.
His legs were topsy-turvy, his arms were out of place,
His nose was on his elbow, not in the middle of his face.
His voice was high and squeaky and difficult to hear
This was because the words he spoke came out of his left ear.
There was a great confusion in what he tried to say
Instead of saying hello, he’d bellow, “Go away!”
When he tried to whisper it ended in a shout,
When he put his clothes on they were always inside out.
His feet were pointing backwards and his smile was upside down
So when he tried to grin at you it turned out like a frown.
This peculiar situation meant his bottom was his top
All day long he did things wrong, he simply couldn’t stop!
His feet were pointing backwards as I’ve already said
So he’d end up going backwards instead of dead ahead.
He wanted friends to talk to, he wanted friends to play
But when they told him “follow us”, he’d go the other way!
Everything about him was mixed up and confused
However hard he tried to please, folks simply weren’t amused.
One day The Princess came to town, her eyes were shiny blue
She was nosey, she was noisy, she was a bit like you!
She loved to dance, she loved to sing, she loved to make a mess,
She loved to shout, she loved to yell, she loved a party-dress.
She was stubborn, she was headstrong, she had to get her way,
If you tried to stop her she’d ruin your entire day.
Whenever she got cross she was a real pain the neck
If you tried to calm her down you’d become a nervous wreck.
She loved to boss her friends about and tell them what to do
All things considered, she was very much like you.
The princess saw poor Billy sitting lonely on the ground
She noticed he was back-to-front and all the wrong way round.
Something moved her in her heart to see him look so sad
It didn’t seem fair to her his luck had been so bad.
She thought of Billy-Back-To-Front on her trip around the town
She remembered he was inside-out and strangely upside down.
Deep inside she was soft and sweet, she wondered what to do,
She had a kindly, loving heart, she was a bit like YOU!
She summoned him to her limo and asked him to explain
If there was any method known that could ease his pain.
Poor Billy stood before her full of fear and dread,
He plucked up all his courage, and this is what he said,
“A passing witch once told me what this is all about,
She told me what I had to do to get it sorted out,
I need to find a Princess who’ll kiss me on my toes….”
“You’re back to front,” the Princess cried “I bet she said your nose!”
She gave young Billy’s nasal nub a smacker of a kiss,
Right on his proboscis, which was very hard to miss.
At this young Billy-Back-To-Front assumed a normal shape,
The Princess’s kiss had done the trick and helped him to escape
His upside-down condition, his inside-out complaint,
For he’d become a Handsome Prince; the Princess felt quite faint,
She fell in love immediately and he was smitten too,
She’d found her own Prince Charming and he his Princess True.
In that very instant romance blossomed in the air,
They married two days later, a right royal pair.
And everybody loved them and admired them from afar,
The Prince was strong and wise and handsome like a movie-star.
The Princess won the people’s hearts with her eyes of shiny blue.
Now I come to think of it, they looked a lot like you!
Here is an introductory audio recording of me reciting “BILLY-BACK-To-FRONT. If you like it you can purchase the entire recording for £5..00.